Topical Chat, September 18, 2006

Wow - Notre Dame, Florida State AND Miami all lost this weekend – happy days are here again!!!!

1. On a Brazilian man who is looking to break the World’s eye-popping record:
“Is that what they’re calling it these days?”

2. On a company that is celebrating its 10-year anniversary of making a Jewish beer called “He-Brew:”
“Act now, and get a free yarmulka with every case purchase!”

3. On a man who claims he had a heart attack during a dispute over an ill-fitting hairpiece that didn't match his hair color and is suing the wig shop:
“Sounds like a hair-raising experience, if you ask me.”

4. On scientists combing through undersea wonders off Indonesia's Papua province saying today they had discovered dozens of new species, including a shark that walks on its fins:
“Those discoveries are really ‘fin-tastic.’”

5. On what is regarded as the most important match for 13 years, Veselin Topalov and Vladimir Kramnik will face each other across a board for the right to be undisputed world chess champion:
“This is about as exciting as the ‘Grass-Growing World Series.’”

6. On a new documentary, called “Jesus Camp,” that shows a bible camp, with its followers speaking in tongues, weeping for salvation, praying for an end to abortion and worshipping a picture of President Bush:
“Good to see we are finally bringing our kids up the ‘right’ way.”

7. On an unidentified gunmen shooting and killing an elderly Italian nun at a hospital in the Islamist-controlled Somali capital:“This is why Islam is so popular right now.”

8. On the leaders of a village in the Indian state of Rajasthan ordering 150 men to dip their hands into boiling oil to prove their innocence after food was stolen from a local school:
“Thank goodness nobody took the virginity of a young girl.”