Topical Chat - December 21, 2005

Oh so close to the holidays, but I hear we are supposed to have a high of 53 degrees on Christmas Eve – what gives? I’m not sure if I will get to the Topical Chat on Friday, but I will try.

1. On Sir Elton John tying the knot with his partner David Furnish in Britain:
“Wait, Elton John is gay???? Next thing you’ll tell me is that Liberace was gay AND died of AIDS!”

2. On New York City entering the second day of transit strike:
“This should help NYC’s hotels and restaurants a heap. It might be worse to live in or visit New York, than it would be to be a student at Florida State.”

3. On Joe Paterno being voted AP coach of the year:
“After hearing the news, it was reported that he soiled his Depends. On a serious note though, I am proud to be a Penn Stater.”

4. On an Oklahoma woman giving birth to a 14 pound, 3 Ounce baby:
“Subway immediately called to see if the mother would like to put her baby on the Bacon Chicken Ranch diet plan.”

5. On a man caught in a woman's restroom after a wacky chase involving an officer who received a ride from a pizza deliveryman:
“It should be noted that the 5-5-5 pizza deal was not delivered in time.”

6. On Lafayette's Cajundome asking for 70 volunteers to flush more than 200 toilets in the building to test the plumbing:
“Additionally, they are offering extra spicy Cajun food in order to ‘help the process move along.’”

7. On a newspaper reporter in Michigan who printed a same-sex wedding announcement in the newspaper as a prank, and then got fired:
“I guess nobody in Michigan has a sense of humor … and also, nobody in Michigan can tell a good joke as well.”

8. On federal agents having seized hundreds of pot plants in a raid on a San Francisco medical marijuana club:
“Marijuana club? I’ve heard of Bridge clubs, bowling clubs, night clubs, and even turkey clubs, but not marijuana clubs … at least not anywhere outside of Amsterdam.”