Topical Chat, October 5, 2005

Hump Day! .... mmmm.... hump.

1. On Germans drinking less beer and eating more food at this year's Oktoberfest compared to last year's Oktoberfest:
"Lies....all of them lies....unless they now consider beer to be food."

2. On a woman who tried to use her toddler's ID to open a bank account to try to pay off a loan:
"I guess it is never too early to ruin someone's credit."

3. On the design of the new nickel:
"Thank goodness this was near the top of the priority list. Forget about trying to redesign the $1 coin for the umpteenth time - it's time the 'important' nickel got a face-lift!"

4. On a nude burglar who asked the victim for his underwear in mid-escape:
"I wonder if the victim had already soiled his underwear by this point."

5. On a college student at the University of Buffalo, passing out in the college President's office after a heavy night of drinking:
"Now this is creative, unique, and probably difficult to do ... I give it a 9.5."

6. On the start of the baseball playoffs:
"With practically the same exact teams in it as last season, I am really excited ... FOR HOCKEY TO START!"

7. On the NHL starting the regular season tonight:
"I am eagerly anticipating this, and I hope I do not get disappointed .... by the way, what channel is the Outdoor Life Network on?"

8. On Honda designing a car that is friendly for dogs - with a special crate in the glove compartmet:
"How about designing a car that actually looks good, and doesn't look so box-like and boring? Even Volvo finally got the idea and started designing decent-looking cars."