Topical Chat, September 30, 2005
I probably only speak for myself when I say THANK GOD HOCKEY IS BACK!!! ... now if I can only figure out what channel the Outdoor Life Network is, I'll be set.
1. On a man found driving an ambulance with a dead deer in it:
"Mentally unstable people are often amusing..."
2. On an "Oy Vey" traffic sign that is now up in Brooklyn:
"How about the sign 'it is now safe to remove your bullet-proof vests,' or 'Yankees suck.'"
3. On a woman that had to prove to her boss at a nursing home that she was wearing a bra:
"Who was the boss, Bill O'Reilly?"
4. On a school that has hired a heterosexuality officer in Australia:
"Is heterosexuality now in the minority in Australia?"
5. On the canine flu that has been spreading recently:
"Better stay away from the seedy Asian restaurants."
6. On 36,000 pounds of candy being stolen in Indiana:
"Who is this thief master-mind? We he start with candy, and then progress to Tonka trucks?"
7. On a nw concept car that pivots 360 degrees, which is designed for people who have trouble parallel parking:
"How about a concept car that automatically puts makeup on women, so they can pay attention to the road in the morning (I'm sure I won't get any negative feedback from this one)?"
8. On a Pastor in Nebraska who received a shipment of 500 Viagra pills:
"What kind of sign from God is this?"
posted by Los @ 8:53 AM
2 guys/gals who rule
2 Comments:
Were you being facetious? I don't get it.
1. He was just trying to take the deer to the emergency wing of a hospital.
2. I've always been partial to the parking space saving sign: "You take-a my place, I break-a you face."
3. Does it really matter if she was wearing a bra or not?
4. Heterosexuality must be against the law in Australia now?
5. Canine flu, bird flu, simian flu... what next???
6. So I'm guessing the robber(s) made a "sweet" score?? Get it?
7. Or how about a car that is equipped with gatling guns so I can express my road rage in a constructively LOUD way?
8. The voice of God to the Pastor:
"I have sent thee these holy boner pills, so that thou may go unto thy flock and fornicate and spread the seed of God, thy God!"
1. On a man found driving an ambulance with a dead deer in it:
MMMMM... venison!
2. On an "Oy Vey" traffic sign that is now up in Brooklyn:
Can we get a sign in Philly like that? It could say, "Yo, have a friggin' cheesesteak!"
3. On a woman that had to prove to her boss at a nursing home that she was wearing a bra:
"Who was the boss, Bill O'Reilly?"
HEYYYY-OHHHHH!
4. On a school that has hired a heterosexuality officer in Australia:
Think of the pick up lines with a hot babe. "Yes maam, I am a heterosexuality officer. I need to test your heterosexuality. Now if you will just blow on... I mean into this hose, we can get the test started."
5. On the canine flu that has been spreading recently:
Just give the dogs some NyQuil or something.
6. On 36,000 pounds of candy being stolen in Indiana:
Shit... I thought I wasn't going to get caught. This diet makes me do crazy things.
7. On a nw concept car that pivots 360 degrees, which is designed for people who have trouble parallel parking:
"How about a concept car that automatically puts makeup on women, so they can pay attention to the road in the morning (I'm sure I won't get any negative feedback from this one)?"
Karl... you're assuming woen actually read your blog.
8. On a Pastor in Nebraska who received a shipment of 500 Viagra pills:
"What kind of sign from God is this?"
A sign that Nebraska needs to start fucking more.
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