Topical Chat, April 26, 2005
The news this week hasn't been as good as last week's, but I found some stuff:
1. On Lenny Dykstra's steroid allegations:
"I was about as shocked at this as I was when I heard that Liberace was gay."
2. On the first round of the NFL draft:
"I'm surprised the NFL doesn't give each team 20 minutes to select a pick, so that the entire first day could be dedicated to the first round. Oh, and Chris Berman is losing it."
3. On a surfer getting attacked by a shark and then continuing to surf:
"Some people are just asking for it."
4. On 3-D technology that may eliminate 3-D glasses:
"What's wrong with 3-D glasses? How will we know we are watching 3-D movies?"
5. On the woman who was given a choice between giving up her Packers season tickets for a season or 90 days in jail:
"Normally, this would be a tough choice, but I don't think the Packers will be very good this year."
6. On Tiberius, winning Drake University's "Most Beautiful Bulldog" contest:
"Crazy college kids."
7. On comedian George Lopez getting a kidney from his wife:
"George Lopez is considered a comedian?"
8. On Michael Jackson parting ways with yet another attorney:
"I don't know if he will be able to achieve his goal of finding an attorney who is a third-grader."
posted by Los @ 11:07 AM
8 guys/gals who rule
8 Comments:
1. This was the last phillies team I ever rooted for. I'm glad to find out that it was tainted. Did I mention I hate the phillies?
2. Now if MEGA ran that draft- shit would get done!
3. I'm not surprised.
4. I hadn't read this but believe it or not, I'm actually interested. Going to movies has been a drag as of late.
5. Hadn't heard about this either. I'd like to know if we're talking a martha stewart type prison or a federal pound-you-in-the-ass type prison before giving my final answer.
6. I'm surprised Nicole Ritchie didn't win... oooohhhh!!!!!
7. George Lopez has a wife?
8. I wish Michael Jackson would do something really crazy, like show up to court without his hair and nose. That would be both the most disgusting, yet awesome thing he's ever done.
1. Liberace was GAY??!!!!????
2. It would impove the quality and downright funness (it's a word, look it up, biatch) of the game if it was a REAL draft. Give the players weapons and grenades and mortars then tell them to go play their pissant game. Hell, I'd even approve of their outrageously inflated salaries... we'll just call it Danger Pay.
3. Somewhere, there is a Hammerhead shark ringing a bell saying, "Dinner is served and it tastes like idiot!"
4. But aren't all glasses in 3-D?
5. Not enough info, Karl. Why was she giving up the tickets?
6. Bow-wow-wow-yippee-yo-yippee-yay.
7. Viva la rasa, clown! Seriously, though, even Karl is funnier than George Lopez. (and we all know how craptastic Karl's sense of humor is)
8. Can we just lynch this sick fuck already?
1. Lenny Dykstra on steroids:
In 1993 he was "Nails." In 1992 he was "Thumbtacks."
2. Length of the NFL draft:
Welcome to the NFL Draft. The San Francisco 49ers are on the sundial.
3. On surfing after getting attacked by a shark:
Killer wave, Dude!
4. On 3-D glasses:
I thought you were so busy at work, you didn't have time to cause yourself to need glasses. And I don't want to know about the 3-D part.
5. Packers tickets vs. jail:
Obviously, she wasn't mooning Randy Moss.
6. On Drake University's "Most Beautiful Bulldog" contest:
Drake is in Iowa. Which sorority sister won?
7. On comedian George Lopez getting a kidney from his wife:
George, best wishes. Take your time and be sure you're fully recovered before returning.
8. On Michael Jackson:
There is a company called Rent My Son (www.rentmyson.com) - I am NOT making this up! This MUST be Michael Jackson's dream come true.
Quoting jeff:
"4. On 3-D glasses:
I thought you were so busy at work, you didn't have time to cause yourself to need glasses. And I don't want to know about the 3-D part."
Hahahahaha, that was so funny it made me spit out my pop tart.
Jeff, I'd respond to that, but I'm so busy at work, I don't even have time to.....
On 3-D glasses: 3-D glasses brought the musical group WHAM! into my life.
^^ my condolensces.
All you need do is whip it, just whip it...hmm hmmm hmm hmmmm!
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