Topical Chat, December 4, 2006

21 more days until Christmas … worth noting.

1. On the principal of Rio Grande High School possibly being in trouble for taking one of his students to a barber shop without permission of the pupil's parents:
“What’s worth is that he demanded the student get his hair cut, ‘below the belt.’”

2. On a report that Air Force radio frequency that is used for Homeland Security threats also jams garage door openers:
“Worse yet, this radio frequency also inexplicably plays Yoko Ono songs on all radio stations in a 50 mile radius.”

3. On a beer distributor saying that the state of Maine is being a Scrooge by barring it from selling a beer with a label depicting Santa Claus enjoying a pint of brew:
“They seem to be o.k. with Marlboro’s Smokin’ Santa display, though.”

4. On New York City cracking down on illegal mystery meat sales:
“My question is, are they o.k. with legal mystery meat sales, and if so, what is included on this list?”

5. On a grandmother who was found with a trunkful of marijuana was convicted of drug running in what prosecutors said was an attempt to earn cash for a bingo habit:
“First it’s bingo, then tic-tac-toe …. When will it all end?”

6. On a teen accused of ordering from at least three fast food drive-thrus nude facing an indecent exposure charge:
“You don’t wanna know what he was dipping in the ketchup …”

7. On a West Virginia city’s nativity scene not including the baby Jesus:
“Good thing it has the Wal Mart polar bear.”

8. On North Carolina’s government debating whether or not to lift the ban on hunting on Sundays:
“Looks like we’ll have to put that pesky incest debate on the back burner.”