Topical Chat, November 17, 2006

Topical Chat, November 17, 2006

Gotta love those Nor-Easters … especially during rush hour.

1. On an American man who caught 116 tossed grapes in his mouth in three minutes in what he hopes will become a new Guinness World Record:
“He has immediately become a legend in the gay community.”

2. On U.S. marshals and finding a 3-foot alligator and a 3-foot caiman at a Red Roof Inn in Greensboro:
“Apparently, these ‘suspects’ were sought in an illegal boots and purse trafficking sting.”

3. On a renowned black magic practitioner performing a voodoo ritual Thursday to jinx President George W. Bush and his entourage while he was on a brief visit to Indonesia:
“Um … is it legal to use the words ‘renowned’ and ‘black magic practitioner’ in the same sentence?”

4. On a would-be kidnapper accidentally shooting himself in the groin:
“I was gonna say that this guy has a lot of balls, but that might be inaccurate now.”

5. On a rogue sea-lion biting 14 people in San Francisco:
“Governor Schwarzenegger immediately deputized said sea-lion.”

6. On police stopping a strip-tease performance at the local chapter of the International Order of Old Bastards:
“This may be the coolest name for a group that I’ve ever heard.”

7. On the Spanish Health Ministry banning a Burger King ad campaign for its monster XXL burger - the caloric equivalent of eating 10 fried eggs - because it violates a Spanish initiative against obesity:
“However, the XL, L, M, and S burger ads are still legal.”

8. On a claim by Google that home-made videos, songs, Web blogs and other user-generated content online will eventually exceed the amount of professionally produced content:
“I’m just wondering where I fit in all of this?”