Topical Chat November 6, 2006

We are getting close to Thanksgiving, and I, for one, can’t wait to hear the Adam Sandler song.

1. On Sadam Hussein being sentenced to death:
‘What’s he still doing alive, anyway?”

2. On police in Indiana charging a 3-month old baby with robbery, extortion, and banditry:
“If the baby was being breast-fed, would they also charge him with sexual harassment?”

3. On a couple that began squabbling in a motel room Friday morning and carried their dispute over to an adjacent Waffle House restaurant in the nude:
“I had no ideas that the Waffle House served fish tacos.”

4. On a detective who was suspended after testing positive for drugs saying his wife served him meatballs spiked with marijuana because she wanted to keep him out of harm's way by forcing him into retirement:
“I'm surprised no criminal has ever thought of putting weed in Dunkin Donuts food.”

5. On a dead representative running for re-election in Texas:
“The sad part is that she probably will get more accomplished this way.”

6. On supermarket champagne beating expensive champagne in a taste test:
“I can’t wait to go out and buy Piggly Wiggly Chablis.”

7. On an inventor that claims he has invented a condom that can be put on in one second:
“I submit the name – Quick Prick.”

8. On a machine that has been invented to encourage children to work out while they are playing computer games:
“It’s called the parent.”