Topical Chat, May 14, 2007

Happy Mother’s Day, all! Throw one down for the woman who presented you to this world!

1. On a romantic cruise which was supposed to end in a marriage proposal going way off course when the borrowed boat the Victorian couple were on burst into flames:
“This can’t be a good sign, can it?”
http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,,21723132-5001028,00.html

2. On a man who threw a burning object at a portrait of Mao Zedong that hangs over Tiananmen Square in central Beijing, slightly damaging it and prompting police to close the nearby imperial palace:
“The man was immediately ran over repeatedly by a tank.”
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070513/ap_on_re_as/china_mao_portrait_damaged;_ylt=AohfPNZBsVBXA3NvqiytF0bMWM0F

3. On 5,500 people in London's Trafalgar Square smashing the record for the world's largest coconut orchestra :“
“Hopefully, they played the song Kokomo.”
http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,,21722491-5012895,00.html

4. On a determined turtle crawling up a flight of stairs and trudging toward Central Park's ice skating rink in an apparent urge to lay eggs near the rink:
“Isaih Thomas immediately signed the turtle to a 5-year contract.”
http://www.newsday.com/news/science/wire/sns-ap-urban-turtle,0,283233.story?coll=sns-ap-science-headlines

5. On the world's largest floating bookshop, opening to the public in Japan:
“Why do I get the feeling that this won’t end up very well?”
http://search.japantimes.co.jp/cgi-bin/nb20070513a2.html

6. On a 62-year-old woman who was sentenced to three years in prison for locking her grandson inside a dog kennel every night for three years while she went to work as a jail counselor:
“Son, why don’t you want to go to grandma’s house, anyway?”
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/05/12/national/main2794172.shtml

7. On a Canterbury woman who was killed after being ejected from a motorcycle and struck by a passing ambulance:
“Too bad Jim Varney died, I could see a plot line for a new ‘Ernest’ movie.”
http://www.theday.com/re.aspx?re=6580d375-0d3e-4809-8edb-7ea4cfff7829

8. On the names Emily and Emma being the most popular names given to baby girls born in the United States last year, while the boys were dominated by Jacobs and Michaels:
“George Costanza is happy that the name ‘Soda” wasn’t on the list.”
http://www.upi.com/NewsTrack/Quirks/2007/05/12/another_big_year_for_jacobs_and_emilys/2412/